Frequently Unasked Questions

If I Google you, will I still want to date you?

Probably not.

We hate to ask since we’re not at a party, but “What do you do?”

I’m an award-deserving author, humor writer, teacher, speaker, and creator and former editor of Funny Women on The Rumpus. 

My first book is HYSTERICAL, and it was a semi-finalist for The 23rd Thurber House Prize for American Humor. My second book is INSIDE JOKES: A Comedy and Creativity Guide for All Writers, out October 20th, 2026.

I used to edit various impressive books. I have since gone on to be a barista.

Currently, I write cultural and personal criticism and teach humor & satire writing, funny personal essays, and tragicomic memoir. My writing has appeared in over 30 publications and anthologies, and I’ve taught and lectured at over 20 writing programs, including Harvard.

My newsletter for writers is Tragedy Plus Time, and my newsletter for crazy psycho bitches is Hysterical.

Cheryl Strayed told me to “write like a motherfucker.”

You live in New York; have you been a background actor on 30 Rock?

Yes. Here’s a photo my friend took of her TV:

Who took your author photos?

Celebrity photographer Mindy Tucker.

How do you pronounce your name?

Elissa like “Alyssa Milano” and Bassist like “assist.”